74. Authenticity Is Not Just A Trendy Word

The poor people perception problem

I try very hard to see the bad in people.

I consciously focus on it, oftentimes ruminating on people I know and trying to determine their worst qualities.

I do this for a reason. A good reason. You see, one of my biggest faults is that I tend to always see the good in people. Actually, that’s not fully true. More accurately, I tend to not see the bad in people.

There’s an important difference between always seeing the good versus not seeing the bad in them. When you always see the good in people, it implies that you see the full scope of the person’s humanity yet you decide to focus on their good qualities. On the other hand, when somebody doesn’t see the bad in people, it means they are actually oblivious to the bad qualities.

That’s my problem - I have a very, very tough time recognizing the bad qualities in people. Unless, of course, it’s so blatantly obvious like with, say, a serial axe murderer or a roommate who eats my leftover pizza without asking.

There are both good and bad elements to my brain being wired this way. On the good side, I always assume that everybody is honest and trustworthy. I live on that assumption until such time as 1) they prove me wrong and 2) I realize that they’ve proven me wrong.

The bad side of my poor people perception is that I am probably more apt to be deceived than the average person.

I despise being deceived. One of my biggest triggers is when I feel like I’m being taken advantage of. I’m not the type of person that holds a grudge, except when I’ve been taken advantage of. Then it’s grudge time. It tears at every single fiber in me, enrages me to no end and I begin plotting revenge like the Count of Monte Cristo, but slightly less couth.

Which reminds me, I wanted to talk to you about cars.

The Thing About Cars

I am not an expert on cars. It’s not my passion. It isn’t even among my top 10 passions. During the last personal passion census, it ranked in at an appalling number 14 and was falling fast, recently surpassed by a rapidly rising Twitter passion (@theIAmJeff).

I recognize the name of almost any car part, I’m just not entirely clear on what every one of them does, what they look like and how they work together. So, basically, I know nothing. I can pump gas, I can change a tire, I can refill fluids and check oil. My automobile knowledge drops off a pretty steep cliff from there.

I don’t like buying cars. I don’t like buying tires for cars. I don’t like having to get my car repaired. Why? Because I always feel like I’m being taken advantage of. As we learned a few paragraphs above, I abhor being taken advantage of. Ab. Hor.

In the past, the auto industry has had a reputation for deceiving the uneducated. For somebody like me, who is prone to being blind to bad signals, I’m even more sensitive in situations where I know I need to be wary.

*****Disclaimer for any auto industry people reading this: I recognize that the industry has a better reputation since the ubiquitousness of the Internet. However, please refer to my commentary above where I hold a grudge when I’ve been deceived. An improved reputation does not alter a good, solid grudge*****

I try to educate myself as much as possible about car related stuff but when the mechanic is standing right in front of me talking about needing to replace this, flush that and refurbish the refracting thingamabob, it’s not like I can spend an extra hour on Google to try and figure out if he’s lying or not.

You see my problem here?

The Byron Woodley Effect

Byron Woodley Tires is a tire shop in Santa Monica, California. I first went to them for tires about 25 years ago because they were the closest tire place by my office. I thought I needed new tires. You know what they did? They told me to go away.

On this, my very first trip to Byron Woodley Tires, when I was expecting to spend $1000, and I clearly didn’t have a full understanding of tires, they purposely didn’t sell me anything. They looked at the tires on my car and told me they’d be more than happy to take my money if I really wanted to give it to them but I really didn’t need new tires yet. They told me to come back in another 6-12 months.

Here’s the thing, by doing what they did, they immediately gained my trust. In less than five minutes, without me even spending a penny, I became loyal to them.

The companies I will spend the most money with are the ones who convince me that I don’t need to spend money for all of their services when I don’t need them.

The moment the Byron Woodley Tire people told me I don’t need new tires is the moment I knew I’d be buying my tires from them. And here we are, 25 years later. They are the only tire place I will ever visit and one I’ve recommended to a whole bunch of other, now-loyal customers.

Authenticity Is Not Just A Trendy Word

Just like Byron Woodley did with me, building trust is critical for any brand to garner loyalty from their customers. I went on a whole diatribe about trust a couple months ago that you should read. There may be a pop quiz later.

What is the best and easiest way to build trust? Be authentic.

The word “authenticity” is being used a lot lately. By definition, being authentic means being genuine or real. That said, the current cultural implication of being authentic is that one is also honest, empathetic, trustworthy and vulnerable. The reason for the expanded cultural definition of authenticity can be deduced from the prior years of biased media, partisan politics and distorted perceptions. It didn’t start with Trump and it won’t end with him. It is also not isolated to one side of the aisle.

The gravitational pull of cultural wanting is like a rubber-band. When pulled too far to one side, it will thwack back to the other. Without President Bush there would be no President Obama. Without Obama there would be no Trump. Without Trump, no Biden. Without all of them, there would be no cry for increased authenticity.

But enough about politics and culture, because authenticity is not about them, it’s about you. And me. And your company. And your customers.

How To Build Trust

Forbes Magazine recently published the results of a conversation with an Expert Panel who discussed the “16 Big Upcoming Social Media Trends”. The #1 most important trend? A bigger demand for authenticity.

Why is authenticity the most important thing businesses should be focused on? I believe there are three core reasons:

1. Authenticity builds trust

2. Authenticity inspires loyalty

3. Authenticity strengthens relationships

Trust, loyalty and strong relationships are important at every level within the workplace: Employees, Leaders and Customers.

Employees want to trust their leadership and trust their co-workers

They want to build strong relationships with others on their team. Vulnerability and empathy are the key elements of authenticity from which grow strong teamwork, increased productivity and closer relationships. With these three things in place, people will feel a greater sense of personal fulfillment at work.

Leaders want to be trusted and want their employees to be loyal and motivated

An authentic leader is honest about both the good and bad. They explain not just what needs to happen, but also the why. They recognize their strengths and accept their weaknesses without restraint. An authentic leader is strong where it’s important, like a belief in the vision, and vulnerable when necessary.

Customers want to feel heard, to feel safe, to not be deceived

An authentic company will be just like Byron Woodley, giving advice that benefits the customer even though it may not fully benefit the company. Customers want to be loyal and are looking for the honesty and authenticity that makes them feel special and gives them the reason to keep coming back.

The Big Takeaway

Truthfully, I’m not sure how to end this besides saying, “it’s good to be authentic.” Because the fact is that, whether you define yourself as a business owner, a company/department leader, or an employee, authenticity helps create a more fulfilling atmosphere and, if embraced by everybody, it creates a company culture that is primed for growth.

So, well…. It’s good to be authentic.