145. The Five Rules For Gaining Respect
Last newsletter I talked about the unspoken deal we have in the workplace called “mutual respect”
I will respect your time and I expect you to respect mine.
One of the most annoying things about going to the doctor is that they expect you to show up early, yet the doctor is rarely - if ever - on time.
Dr. Molly Griffin is different. She’s my dermatologist. She respects people’s time like no other doctor I know and, in turn, asks that people respect hers.
Dr. Griffin guarantees to be on time for every appointment - and she is. If your appointment is at 2pm, you’re in the room by 1:55 and she’s walking in the door by 2.
If you are late for an appointment with Dr. Griffin, you will miss your time, have to reschedule, and will be charged a fee.
It’s simple. It’s respectful. I love that.
The Most Valuable Commodity
Our most valuable commodity in the world is time. Once it’s gone, it’s gone for good.
As the author Rick Warren so eloquently said:
The greatest gift you can give somebody is your time. Because when you give your time you are giving a portion of your life that you will never get back.
Great leadership, regardless of your title, starts with respecting other people. When you respect other people, they respect you in return.
Respecting other people starts with respecting their time.
Treasuring Time
The quickest and easiest way to show your respect for others is to do alter your behavior at meetings. These are the five rules I follow for gaining respect via meetings.
1. Always be early
Show up to meetings 2-5 minutes early. Make sure you’re the first face there. That makes a big impression. Bosses remember the people who are always the first ones to a meeting. That simple act of consistently showing up early builds trust and reliability that extends far beyond meetings.
2. Always start on time
Start your meetings exactly on time. Not a minute late or a minute early. If you plan an 11:30 meeting, show up at 11:27 and start it at 11:30 on the dot.
Starting meetings on time positions you as an organized, reliable, and productive person. Those are the behaviors that lead to promotions and pay increases.
3. Don’t wait
Make it known that you will not wait for people to show up.
Set the expectation with your colleagues that you always start meetings on time. You don’t have to repeat the message in words every meeting, just do it in action.
You’ll be surprised. Once you tell people you will be prompt, most everybody will show up on time. Inevitably there may be one or two that still arrive late. It will only take a couple of meetings before they, too, realize they need to be on time.
4. Plan Ahead
The conduct and flow of your meetings are just as important as the start time. Be clear on the purpose of the meeting and how best to accomplish that purpose. Have an agenda and get through it efficiently. Spending five minutes planning before the meeting will save 15 minutes of potentially wasted time.
5. Give notice
If you can’t make a meeting or may even be just 1 minute late, give advance notice. If you’re the meeting leader, have somebody else lead until you get there.
The rules apply to you as much as anybody else. Late is late. Be respectful.
If somebody doesn’t show up for one of your meetings, or is continually late, have a one-on-one conversation with them. Make sure your expectation is clear.
Perhaps you say something like, “I know we are both busy and our time is valuable. I’d really appreciate it if you would show up on time to meetings. If you can’t, just let me know in advance. I promise to respect your time and won’t extend the meeting longer than necessary.”
Their behavior will most likely change.
Have any of these tactics worked for you?
Let me know in the comments or via email.