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D.M. Burgess's avatar

I appreciated your honesty because leadership often grows through reflection rather than perfection. As I read your list, one theme stood out to me: each mistake gradually weakened the story your team could tell about you as a leader. Talking instead of listening, avoiding difficult conversations, failing to delegate, or creating constant urgency don't just affect performance, they create small fractures in trust, expectations, and shared understanding. Individually they seem manageable, but over time they compound until people begin interpreting the leader differently than the leader intends. In my view, that's one of the most overlooked aspects of leadership: influence rarely disappears overnight; it erodes one unresolved narrative fracture at a time.

Shamim Rajani's avatar

One thing I learned the hard way is holding back information, thinking I’m not experienced enough or I might be wrong. That never helps. Leadership doesn’t grow in silence. Urgency also felt like oxygen back then, like everything had to be done right now.

Jeff Matlow's avatar

How’d you get out of it?

Shamim Rajani's avatar

Over time, I’ve learned that real growth came when I kept my mindset open and my ego aside. The moments I chose to observe, listen, and absorb taught me far more than the moments I tried to lead from certainty. When you share openly, you learn just as much in return—and with that comes the ability to shift your thinking, adapt, and see things differently

Jeff Matlow's avatar

Ah if only every leader were like you!

Your comments and insights above are exactly why I like working with female leaders the most. And why I think, in general, female leaders are better than males.

In fact, I was just exploring video editing companies. I narrowed it down to three of them that all seemed to similarly fit my need.

I went with the most expensive one.

Why? It was founded by - and is led by - two women. Because of that, I have greater trust that it will be a reliable company.

Jeff Matlow's avatar

I know the feeling. I’ve been there.

I completely see you.

Justin Hicks's avatar

This feels very relatable! Had some mentors throughout my leadership career good and bad! But lots of those lessons feel the same. What resonates the most is culture over competence!

Jeff Matlow's avatar

Yes, I always say hire for mindset over skillset.

I'd rather hire a B player who fits in with the culture than an A player who doesn't.

Most likely the B player will elevate to an A and the A player will sink to a B.

Muhammad Andri Alfarizki's avatar

Such a amazing explanation. I learned so much from your experience about leadership. Thanks for sharing, Mate!