You are walking down the street, pushing your baby in the stroller.
Someone comes by and says, “Your baby is beautiful.”
You say, “Thank you.”
But wait.
Stop.
Think about that for a second.
What exactly are you being thanked for?
You had sex. The baby happened.
If you’re the male, you contributed about seven minutes of effort and one cell. The female did the other nine months.
The baby’s looks came from some genetic roulette that started a few hundred thousand years ago.
But you say “thank you” anyway, like you painted the kid’s face yourself.
My Cute Dog
The same thing happens to me with my dog.
People stop me on the street and say, “Oh my God, she’s so cute.”
And I almost say, “Thank you.”
But thanks for what?
I didn’t design her ears.
I didn’t choose the color of her fur.
I don’t deserve credit for her face.
It’s not like I have a super sophisticated eye for adopting rescue dogs.
It seems weird to say “thank you”, and more than a little shallow too.
Now, I’m not judging you if you do it, ’cause I do it too.
It’s polite. It’s reflex. It’s just what you do when someone says something nice.
But it got me thinking about how often in our work lives we accept credit for things we had nothing to do with.
The Leader Who Takes Your Credit
I saw this recently, where the team hit their quarterly number. The all-hands happened, and everyone looked at the leader.
He smiled. He nodded. He said something like, “We really worked hard this quarter.”
But he wasn’t the one staying late on Tuesday.
He wasn’t the one on the phone with the unhappy customer at six o’clock on a Friday.
He wasn’t the one fixing the bug until 2:00 a.m.
He was just a warm body in the right place.
I see this constantly with leaders. They mistake being present for being responsible. They accept the applause and forget the entire cast of characters that created it.
What they don’t realize is that the team notices it every single time.
They’ll Remember Everything You Didn’t Say
I have a client. Let’s call him Ted, because Ted Lasso. Need I say more?
Ted ran a sales team that had a genuinely great quarter. They had a big number to beat, and they beat it. The CEO praised the whole team in front of the company.
Ted smiled and said the right things about how proud he was of everyone.
What he didn’t do was name a single person on the team.
I asked him about it afterward. He said he didn’t want to single anyone out.
That sounds generous.
It isn’t.
Because his team watched him stand in the spotlight for three to five minutes there and heard their names exactly zero times.
And every single one of them will remember that. Maybe not consciously, but I guarantee you they’ll remember.
The Important Thing About Giving Credit
Here’s the thing about credit that most people get wrong:
It doesn’t divide when you share it. It actually multiplies.
When you say, “Thank you. Maya led that whole client relationship,” you’re not losing credit. You’re gaining credibility.
You’re proving that you’re paying attention to exactly who did what, and you’re showing that you’re not the kind of leader who confuses your presence with their performance.
Because nothing erodes trust faster than a leader who takes credit for someone else’s work.
You’ve been there. I’ve been there. It sucks.
Say My Name, Say My Name
So here’s the small thing I want you to try.
Next time someone praises a result that other people were involved in, say the names of the people who actually did the work.
“Thank you. Maya led the whole thing with help from Alex and Janice.”
That’s it. That’s all you have to say. That’s how easy it is to become the kind of leader people actually want to work for.
Because leadership isn’t about collecting credit.
It’s about giving it.
So next time somebody tells you that your baby is beautiful, don’t just stand there. Own it.
And then give the credit to the person who did the actual work.
If you wish you or your team communicated more effectively, I put on a free Leadership Diagnostic Workshop that addresses that exactly. Reserve your seat now.
